I look timidly from the window panes
Descrying the stretch of open vastness
Or is that the omen I am looking for -
The caw of the crow over running rooftops
The cusps of this nightmare
Occludes the path of that dream
Or is that the omen I am looking for -
Over the roads where chariots rolls on
In the four corners of this walled rooms
Obedience servitudes unnecessary veneration
Or is that the omen I am looking for -
To reinstate my abnegated freedom.
12 comments:
Wow! Such a good one. Is this true?
"The caw of the crow over running rooftops The cusps of this nightmare
Occludes the path of that dream."
Hope things are just fine with you. God bless.
This is quite beautiful and I feel a bit of sentiment. Lovely.
Tara
I feel from this the pressures of the world trapped in an artificial setting.
Or maybe its just me :p I do need an Omen too, one that gives solutions.
omens abound here, hope one proves wothwhile
Gosh I love the structure of this Alok.
I agree with Ghost particle this seems to speak of such a trapped feeling both real and imagined - the last line hinting that perhaps it is imagined after all.
I too accept with ghostparticle.. need an omen that satisfies our needs...
The sign of something going to happen well is courage. Nicely written alok!
I agree with Ghosty...this verse voices the pressures of the world trapped in an artificial setting. r we rite?
Keshi.
I love how you repeat the word "omen" - It gives a depth to the poem. Very nice!
Venus: Thank you so much for the kind words ... If you ask me I have no clue whether the omens are true or not ... the clawing of the crow I had read somewhere is a good omen though I have no clue whether it indeed is a good one ... The others I just made up hoping they would act as an omen :)
Moreover omens are every where and it is us who needs to keep the eyes open ..... so for the situation narrated, I was hoping they would act as an omen
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Tara [Inside our hands, outside our heart:] Thank you so much
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Shiva [Ghost Particle]: It is not exactly an artificial setting. I was sitting in the room when I wrote this :) Nah! just kidding ...On a serious note, dunno abt the artificial part but it is definitely a fiction ... so might it might be you know ....
I too am looking out for the omen that gives the "desired solutions".
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Tony [laughing wolf], I hope too ...
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Janice: Thank you so much ... It is imagined but perhaps in some real context .. or is it ... :)
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Kalai: Thank you (see my reply to Ghosty)
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Jeevan: So true buddy ... thank you
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Keshi: Can you guys be wrong ... as it is there is nothing right or wrong .. they are all so relative :) thank you
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Andrew: Thank you so much
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Alok
You always come with new insight and great emotions with strong words.
thanks for tht very encouraging comment Pria ...
Alok
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