Sunday, June 15, 2008

and with a wry shrug of our shoulders
we let the numinous structures
of individual past dissolve
in the whirling smoke
of filtered cigarettes, sitting
on the rocks of Marine Drive,
littered with several old sins,
buried, now proudly rediscovered -
whose fate, ill-fated to have survived
invective reproach of rumour mills.

“man, those were the days”,
classic clichéd terms we used
and within few minutes, antedate
future artificial scenes
that danced the skank
to the reggae of Arabian Sea; and
admiration for time’s ironical gallows
grew with each passing smoke;
life that returned after a long silent void
on way back home: a long evening on road.

70 comments:

Alok said...

Staying with memories, staying with friends, staying with past and staying with Mumbai :)


Alok

Priya said...

Ahh the memories... They are small tides which makes us live on a purpose isn't it.

Tom Evans said...

I was playing about with this idea in my story very recently. The idea of living a pure disconnected memory. Knowing that the present will be with you forever connects you with time, however, briefly and lets you touch immortality, or even true mortality.

Miladysa said...

You paint the scene and emotions so well.

I love the opening line :-D

Jeeves said...

Loovvveed it....It shared in my blog now.....

Jeevan said...

Let it give u more pleasure, missing your home stay these days. enjoy your stay buddy :)

aria said...

this was really visual .. I loved the first stanza more.. could relate in my own way.. different location but the feelings.. you know ..

pS : the "co-incidence" you talked about(on my space) is interesting .. made me smile .. :)

Casperbaba said...

welcome back my friend...
has been a while since i read ur words... nd wat a relief this time!

memories my frind in true javed akhtar style i wud say...
"nagmey hain,
shikwey hai,
kissey hain,
batein hain,
batein bhool jatee hain,
yadein yaad aati hain."

loved it!

Anonymous said...

Whoa! Whoa! I was totally blown off my seat. Enjoyed your poem, this theme is so common, so re-occurring and you've beautifully laid it out, with choice words. Lovely indeed!

Keshi said...

**and admiration for time’s ironical gallows


really loved that expression Alok! It spoke volumes.


Keshi.

Steve Isham said...

'littered with several old sins,
buried, now proudly rediscovered' Thats us! In 8 words you've nailed the culture of the whole human race.

venuss66 said...

Very well written.You are missing your homeland. Take care my fren.

Janice Thomson said...

Gosh some of the images here are astounding.
Ah, the memories, yes, the memories.
Well done Alok!

human being said...

Hmmmmmmmmm
loved the multi-layered imagery...

from now on, i'd love to define nostalgia as:

'reflections driving wheels back home.'

thanks Alok for dropping by my blog and letting me know you and your marvelous poetry...
namaste

J. Andrew Lockhart said...

this is so rich! I always love your poetry. :)

Jyoti said...

memories are like pearls, and you beautifully have made a jewellery out of that.

m sure you are staying up with life and happiness too :)

Alok said...

Priya: U said it beautifully .. small tides indeed ... thank u

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Tom Evans: I loved ur reading ... it is indeed a purely disconnected memory ... loved the way u saw this ... cheers

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Miladysa: I was a little hesitant starting with "and" but then thts the first thing that came to my mind and stuck with it ... am so glad the 1st line worked for u ... thanks a lot

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Jeevs: thanks ... felt very nice ... was infact honoured by ur gesture ... thanks again

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Jeevan: thank u my friend as always ..

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Aria: What better than to find someone able to relate back someone's else's words to their life ... I derive immense satisfaction when someone is able to do that ... all I can say is thank u so much .... and for the coincidence I did say "a mention of it" or something like that :)

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Prabhjeet: I didnt know that was written by Javed Akhtar ... thanks a lot ... one of the very beautifully written songs ... thanks for sharing

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Javits: Whao, I sat straight reading ur comment. Thank u so much for such a lovely comment. Welcome to this space ... Thanks

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Keshi: I am glad u noticed that line .... So many images I drew after that line came to my mind ... thanks again

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Ish: That comment means a lot u know ... I will treasure it ... thanks

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Mary: Thanks a lot for ur words as usual

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Janice: My thanks to u as always .. Am glad u liked it

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Human being: Welcome and thanks for that lovely comment ... I am sure we will meet often :)

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Andrew: U make me overestimate my self ... I always thought I wrote crap ... but then u did make my day ... I am delighted beyond words .....

-------------------------------------------

Jyoti: Ah! thank u so much ... such a unique compliment ... I indeed am staying with life and happiness :) thats wht life is all about for me ... thanks


Thanks to all of you for such love and encouragement. i am truly overwhelmed by the ur responses .. thanks a lot again


Alok

man in painting said...

admiration for time’s ironical gallows

grew with each passing smoke....
What a feeling!
Nostalgic,real as well as surreal.
Congrats.
Me too blog.
Do visit...

Mr Pineapples said...

"numinous" what's that?

magiceye said...

vivid imagery... beautiful

david santos said...

I loved this post.
Happy day

Keshi said...

cos ur brilliant!

Keshi.

delhidreams said...

:)
is lambi udaas zindagi mein, jo lamhe gujare the tera naam lekar, bus wahi reh gaye hain ab, dheere se muskurane ko

The Wandering Hermit said...

"time’s ironical gallows
grew with each passing smoke;silence after long evenings on road:
reflections driving wheels back home".

Simply brilliant these lines..
I often experience a similar detachment to old haunts and deeds.. It all seems like another lifetime, a radically different you and quite surreal..
good one alok.
cheers
z

Mr Pineapples said...

Read this bit of verse a few times now - apart from the bit about having a fag - what's it all about exactly?

Is "Arabian Sea" a reggae band? I have not heard of them. Are they any good? I used to like Bob Marley when I was young but I knew that he smoked a lot too.

Trouble with some poetry - it's like a jigsaw puzzle - takes ages to work out. And why? What's the point of making something like a rubic cube - fiddling about to understand the meaning.

Get me?

Inside our hands, outside our hearts said...

I have not been around much, but when I do get here you hit me hard with your writings.

Alok, you are getting more intense or perhaps deeper, either way I love it. You are growing with your writing and that is also wonderful!

Soft love,
T

Alok said...

@ Man in Painting: Thank you for your visit. i did visit your blog. You write admirable stuff. Thanks for dropping by

------------------------------------

@magiceye: thanks. appreciated.

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@david santos: Thanks for dropping by. You have a gr8 day too :)

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@Keshi: You are kind. Thanks so much.

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adi: Zindagi udaas nahi hai mere dost.... muskurane ke bahane nahi hote :) thanks as usual

------------------------------------
@ Zofo (The Wandering Hermit): Glad to see you after such a long time. Thanks so much for dropping by

-------------------------------------
@ Mr Pineapples: First of all thank you so much for your time. I always thought I wrote crap but the fact that you thought this verse worthy of a couple of read gives me immense pleasure. Really appreciated.

I for one donot have any technical knowledge of writing poetry and I donot purposely write difficult or complex poetry. I try not be abstract but then it is very clear that I am not successful in that. I have always maintained that poetry that cannot explain itself is a failed poetry and I guess this one is another failed poetry of mine. But then I also believe that if lines can hit one in some way (whether or not the author thought about it in that way), that is poetry.

I will try to explain what I tried in this piece.

Context: The poem (if you may call it so) deals with memories. For the purpose of background the narrator (N) stays far away from his friends and family in Singapore. He grew up in a place called Calcutta and spent considerable time in Mumbai. Mumbai was a place where he found love and friendship in abundance. Mumbai holds special place in his heart. But then as with all other things in life, the present and the future puts a dust on past and what remains is memory and yearning.

On a Sunday morning, N happens to talk to one of his erstwhile close friends after a long time. While catching up on “those days” they go through beautiful memories of the time spent together in Mumbai especially the long hours spent in knowing each other, discussing their past in minutest of details and drawing up their future on the shores of Arabian Sea with the same eloquence with which they reflected on their past.

Setting: Mumbai. Mumbai as you might be aware is surrounded by the Arabian Sea on three sides. Marine Drive along with Worli Sea Face, Juhu Beach and Chowpati are few places (along the sea side) where friends and family generally gather together after work or on weekends to spend some “quality time”. I for one had spent several evenings with this friend of mine in these places. Our causeries ranged from “those days” to “time’s irony” to what the future holds for us. The piece tries to capture one such evening in words.

Inline:

Verse 1

The way relationships are structured these days, it is extremely difficult to be honest about ourselves to anyone and everyone. We all seem to live in oblivion to what we are or what we were. There are very few people who know the real us. What the world sees is only a reflection of what we want us to be and what we want them to see. We all want to look “the best”. And we make every effort in order to achieve this goals. This may range from wearing what is “fashionable” as per “Milan” to building stories about our past that are as distant to reality as are the “fashionable attires” to “clothings”. The race for being “the best” is so driven that we tend to build “numinous structures” around our ourselves – our pasts and presents and for that matter our life. “Numinous (pronounced /’njuːmɨnəs/) is a Latin term coined by German theologian Rudolf Otto to describe that which is wholly other. It is also associated with “The numinous is the mysterium tremendum et fascinans that leads in different cases to belief in deities, the supernatural, the sacred, the holy, and the transcendent” (reference Wikipedia). In the so called urban world, the way we project our pasts to the “outside world” is all sacred, divine, sublime and out of the world where no devil had ever set his feet, where no wrong had ever taken place. It is also a method applied (I must say very tactically) to showcase how one is well bred and how everything relating to his past is immaculate. N’s relationship with this friend of his could make it possible for N to be totally honest whereby they were able to dissolves these numinous structures and lay open bare with what they were, their experiences, their journeys, their hardship et al. They discuss their old sins (read deeds) openly, that had laid hidden behind their cupboards for several years, accessible to none but themselves. They even managed to escape the spewing rumour mills that are able to churn out all the information these days. And then they just shrug off the past, let it dissolve in the whirling smoke of filtered cigarettes and let them vanish in the presence of the present. The sensation almost tantamounts to liberation. The definition of sins can be varied. For someone's sin might be sex, for others it might be smoking. For some it might be incest for others it might be killing. We all have done something that is wrong in our lives, that we donot wish to discuss with anyone. We know they were “wrongs” by our own moral standards and hence buried in our past but then are times where we take them from the cupboard and proudly display them to the one whom we can trust with our secret. And when everything is laid open and there is nothing else to hide, we just shrug our shoulders and move on.

Verse 2

And when they were through with unraveling their history, they simply exclaimed “man those were the days”; One of the most clichéd terms in history. The past leads them to talk about future. Future that is unknown. But then human beings are masters in building castles in thin air especially when the discussions are between two people who are friends. The normal talks are “in few years time we will be able to achieve this”, or “we will be here” or so on and so forth. Once that scenario is built then they decide the strategies that can help them achieve their visions quickly. It is almost like antedating a cheque. The confidence levels in this kind of talks are admirable. They manage to antedate time. And the brevity of such scene is outstanding. The “merry go lucky” future seems to dance like the high tides of Arabian Sea. (The shores of Arabian Sea generally has boulders laid across all along its way esp at Marine Drive and Worli Sea Face. During hightides one can almost sense the tides dancing to reggae. Such graciousness is there.) The day ends when they drive back home, in their own cars and for N he drives back the memories of “those days” ... memories that are disstant and disconnected but surely related with today's presence.

I do hope I made some sense.

Thank you for reading so closely. I hardly write these days. But I do hope to see you again. have a nice day


@ Tara [Inside our hands, outside our hearts]: that's such a nice thing to say. You visits always makes my day. thank you

Thank you everyone for dropping by and reading. truly appreciated.


Alok

venuss66 said...

Hi alok, how are you?

gP said...

brother...where art thou? u are not a ghost, you are always the best poet i know. :)

J. Andrew Lockhart said...

o.k. - enough's enough -- I want you to write!! :)

human being said...

seems poets are like clouds... we expect them to rain when we see them in the sky...
and when they rain, our mind's land gets ready to be cultivated... to embed a new life's seeds...

know you live your life the way you want... like clouds transforming a shape into another...
yet for a cloud raining is inevitable... all clouds rain sooner or later... if it is on a waiting eager arid land, it'll be a blessing...

Alok, seems many are expecting the rain...

oh... crows are tattletales!!!
:)
------------------------------
enjoyed reading your explanation (on how you were inspired to write this poem) in your answer to Mr. Pineapples...

venuss66 said...

Hi alok, how are you? Why no update?

Sameera Ansari said...

Lovely lines!Brought back memories of my trips to Mumbai :)

J. Andrew Lockhart said...

Line 7 is my favorite. Your writing makes me feel that I'm there. sadness....

aria said...

its been really long.

man in painting said...

Alok..where are you..missing your poetry..
do write..
me have a new one
waiting for your comments..

Casperbaba said...

where r u llost my friend?

Miladysa said...

I hope life is treating you well Alok :-D

Tom Evans said...

Alok, just wanted to drop by and thank you for reading my stuff in the past few weeks. Since I've been away it's been difficult to keep up with the comments and to surf about properly. Anyway, I wanted to mention I appreciate it.

You should get something else up on this site!

J. Andrew Lockhart said...

I see that I had comments about the poem twice. I'm getting old. :)
Again, though, you need to write another. I need to read your work.

Admin said...

hope you are well. come back soon!

Mr Pineapples said...

Wesper - thanks for asking.

I am indeed well...and I will come back soon just to make you happy

Go in peace dear vasper...in piece I say

Anonymous said...

I hope you are well enjoying the summer ..been awhile it good to be here back in your home

Nasra

Miladysa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Miladysa said...

I imagine you are brewing lots of poetry Alok :-D

Jeeves said...

Knock, knock. Where r u?

Inside our hands, outside our hearts said...

Oh Alok. I am need of your magic. Where are you my dear friend?

T

Jyoti said...

enough alok!

its time to update your blog.

Nimmy said...

where? where? what? all ok alok? :-)

Devika Jyothi said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Devika Jyothi said...

reached here somehow..lost the way; but destination seems good.

So common a feeling, yet so freshly put!

loved it...

i too blog, do come if and when you get time:
http://devika-jyothi.blogspot.com/

Anonymous said...

Beautiful expression..
Memories is what we all are left with...

venuss66 said...

Hi alok, how are you? Time to update. Quick.:)

Miladysa said...

Hello Alok :-D

Arti Honrao said...

Memories! *sigh*



GBU
Arti

Keshi said...

where r u Alok? we miss ya!

Keshi.

Miladysa said...

"And needless to say, I miss the Mumbai Rains."

We miss you Alok.

gP said...

hey bro :) u wont blieve where I yam right now :D

Anonymous said...

its been awile ...hope you are well

Nasra

Keshi said...

Alok!!!!!!!!!!! can ya hear me now? :(

Where r u?

Keshi.

kalai said...

Alok, pls check my blog friend...

Miladysa said...

:D

Miladysa said...

Come back - come back - wherever you are ;D

Devika Jyothi said...

Hi Alok!

Long time since i came here...
and you are still where i left you...

But, i saw you in between sometime..or wasn't that you!?

whatever, all are calling you so loud...do come back as fast as you could :)

read some of your older ones...you write so well....such long sojourns can take you far...far from poetry...Hope that doesn't happen :)

wishes,
devika

venuss66 said...

Hi Alok, thank you for your wonderful visit. Do come again. Take care, Alok.

Keshi said...

hey Alok! Im glad ur ok...I was wondering where u were.

btw dun u blog anymore? :(

tnxx for dropping by to say Hi!

TC miss ya!
Keshi.

aria said...

Hello Alok, I tried breaking my silence.. wishing you'd do the same.. sometime soon .. its nice to be remembered.
take care

Miladysa said...

Seasons Greetings to YOU and Yours Alok :D

Devika Jyothi said...

Wish you a Merry Christmas, Alok!

devika

Anonymous said...

bring some poetry ..aliving this forgotten heart ...

Write on

Nasra